306. Spiritually Sassy: How To Dance W/ Your Shadow & Free Yourself From Suffering W/ Sah D'Simone

Sah D'Simone

DISCLAIMER: This podcast is presented for educational and exploratory purposes only. Published content is not intended to be used for diagnosing or treating any illness. Those responsible for this show disclaim responsibility for any possible adverse effects from the use of information presented by Luke or his guests. Please consult with your healthcare provider before using any products referenced. This podcast may contain paid endorsements for products or services.

I’m joined by Sah D’Simone who shares some of the wisdom from his new book, “Spiritually Sassy.”

Sah D’Simone is a spiritual guide, meditation teacher, transformational speaker, and international best-selling author. He is pioneering a spiritually sassy, heart-based healing movement in which joy and authenticity illuminate the path to enlightenment.

Sahs infectious enthusiasm for healing is a revolutionary synthesis of ancient Tantric Buddhism, modern contemplative psychology, meditation, breathwork, and integrative nutrition... all delivered in his own radiant, approachable, and playful style.

DISCLAIMER: This podcast is presented for educational and exploratory purposes only. Published content is not intended to be used for diagnosing or treating any illness. Those responsible for this show disclaim responsibility for any possible adverse effects from the use of information presented by Luke or his guests. Please consult with your healthcare provider before using any products referenced. This podcast may contain paid endorsements for products or services.

This one is for all of our spiritual seekers and finders. 

Sah D’Simone is a friend, spiritual guide, meditation teacher, transformational speaker, and international best-selling author. He’s pioneering a spiritual, sassy, and heart-based healing movement in which joy and authenticity illuminate the path to enlightenment. And his new book, “Spiritually Sassy: 8 Radical Steps to Activate Your Innate Superpowers,” distills the art of living well in the modern world into attainable steps.

Sah’s infectious enthusiasm for healing is a revolutionary synthesis of ancient tantric Buddhism, modern contemplative psychology, meditation, breathwork, and integrative nutrition—all delivered in his own radiant, approachable, and playful style.

This is one of the most hilarious and uplifting chats we’ve had on the show, so lean back, relax, and soak in the sass.

08:40 — Sah guides us through meditation

  • Deep breath in, deep breath out
  • Listening to the silence
  • Feeling the breath
  • Resting your mind

21:27 — Coming out of the spiritual closet

  • Being consistent in your change
  • Making the choice to live with integrity
  • Being radically you across the board
  • When you’re not being yourself, you know
  • Giving yourself permission to be yourself
  • Having one good day at a time
  • Thinking about what you can do right now

41:05 — Know your story to change your story

  • We are unaware of the lives we live because we’re so distracted
  • Go on a trip of regret
  • The difference between guilt and regret
  • Making a choice to do something different
  • We are all good people at our core
  • Making a radical change of perspective
  • Showing compassion for all people

01:07:45 — Learning to forgive yourself or others

  • The pain you’re causing by not forgiving others
  • Losing sight of the beauty of the world
  • Focusing on the present moment
  • Forgiveness is the antidote to the spiritual path

01:15:47 — Spray spiritual bleach on the belief systems that have hurt you

  • Everybody has the same problems
  • Examine your belief systems
  • How your beliefs put people in a box
  • Realize the conditioning you have in the world

01:22:18 — Waking up to your inner wisdom

  • Recognizing the potential inside of us
  • Reaching the flow state
  • How to master things quickly

01:29:18 — Naming your superpower

  • How to find your secret sauce
  • Finding the way to offer what’s in your heart
  • The way you can affect others through your actions
  • Discovering your creative genius

01:34:04 — Believing you are amazing

  • How to live with integrity
  • Seeing reality more clearly
  • Making your external reality a reflection of your internal world

01:39:45 — Use what you have

  • We are more resourceful than we believe we are
  • Zooming out from a victim mindset
  • Making a list of the 10 people in your life who could take you to the next level

01:43:02 — Stay slaying

  • Looking at all of the areas in our lives
  • Putting time towards areas where you are lacking
  • Watering the seeds of your spiritual practice

01:46:02 — Dance, spiritual practice, and online hate

  • Music connects people and moves them
  • Cultivating presence
  • Meditating in every area of your life
  • Dealing with trolls online
  • Handling hate with love

02:04:18 — Three teachers or teachings that have influenced Sah’s life

More about this episode.

Watch it on YouTube.

[00:00:00]Luke Storey:  I'm Luke Storey. For the past 22 years, I've been relentlessly committed to my deepest passion, designing the ultimate lifestyle based on the most powerful principles of spirituality, health, psychology. The Life Stylist podcast is a show dedicated to sharing my discoveries and the experts behind them with you. Sah, it's great to see you again.

[00:00:30]Sah D'Simone:  It's great to see you, too. And thank you for having me.

[00:00:33]Luke Storey:  Sah just moved from New York to LA, guys. And every time you come over, I always think, man, we should have cameras running and we should be recording this because we have these great conversations.

[00:00:42]Sah D'Simone:  That's true.

[00:00:43]Luke Storey:  So, here we are in a real proper conversation for the second time. And I thought a great way to start this would be for you to guide us through a little meditation just to kind of get us grounded.

[00:00:54]Sah D'Simone:  Okay. Sure. Let's do it.

[00:00:56]Luke Storey:  Okay.

[00:00:57]Sah D'Simone:  So, what I like to do is just like a few long exhales, because the exhale is like where the medicine lives, right? So, the long exhale. So, you could close your eyes or remain with your eyes open and take a deep breath into the nose, and the long exhale through the mouth like this. Keep it going. One more deep breath into the nose, out through the mouth. Keep it going. One more deep breath into the nose, out through the mouth. And then, allow the natural breathing rhythm to occur.

[00:02:12] And see, for a moment now, you could just listen for the silence within. And for the next few moments, see if you can just gently touch base with the feeling of the breath and the body. And there are four main areas that you can feel the breath most vividly. See if you feel the breath at the tip of your nose, maybe it's your upper lip, where you feel the breath brushing by as it enters your nostrils, or maybe it's a point in your chest or in your belly.

[00:03:23] See, for the next few moments, you could just rest all the energy of the mind. See if you can just close all the tabs that may be open in your mind and just gather all the powerful energy on the feeling of the breath. One breath in and one breath out. And be kind to yourself, if your attention gets pulled away and a new tab is open about the future, or about the past, or to-do lists, or whatever may be, just invite it back. Gently place it back on the feeling that the breath. 

[00:04:21] It's in this choice to come back, that you are transforming the architecture of your brain, cleansing your mind, and opening your heart. Notice how far your attention is being pulled away, and we're only here for just another brief moment, so just invite it back. Bring it back and place it in the feeling of the breath. Okay, my love. Take a moment now to just take inventory of your internal world. Has anything changed in this few moments of practice?

[00:06:48] Maybe you have released the tight grip on maybe a feeling that you have been carrying with you all day, or maybe a thought pattern has been sort of playing in the background of your mind, and now, you have released it, or maybe nothing's changed. That's okay, too. And if you like, you can bring both hands and pray in front of your heart. Bring a gentle smile to the corner of your lips, even if you don't want to. Blink your eyes open. Thank you for your practice. Thank you. The simplicity of concentrating the mind, right? 

[00:07:41] It's such a divine practice to just like close the tabs or do your best effort to like be aware that there are so many tabs open in the world that tells us, multitasking is the way to be successful. It's such bullshit, right? It's like a scattered mind, can't integrate trauma, can't transform our relationship to the past, and the simplicity of just gathering the energy, the feeling of the breath, one breath in, one breath out. I can't tell you enough about it. I mean, it's like, you really are.

[00:08:15]Luke Storey:  It really is the best, especially before starting a podcast. There's always this, well, not always, but there's often, for me, a very frantic energy of making sure lights, camera, action is all good to go. And I mean, thankfully now, I've got an idea here helping today, so I feel less of that. I walk in, and I'm like, oh, it's all set up and all that. But yeah, I've had a few opportunities to start the show with some kind of drop in like that, when I did Sharon Salzberg out in New York, she did one.

[00:08:46] And recently, Marie Mbouni did like a shamanic song, and I'm like in tears within the first 30 seconds of the episode. I mean, every time we do something like that, I'm like, we should start every show like this. But I don't know that every guest is on board for it. It's interesting as we're in that quiet space, one of my favorite spiritual exercises of all time is just to go still like that, and then ask yourself, what's my next thought going to be? 

[00:09:16] And then, you're instantly in that witness perspective because the moment you see that thought, I stole it from Eckhart Tolle, so I don't want to take credit for it, but not like observing your mind is his copyright or anything. But I like the way that he phrased that because the moment then you see that thought, you realize that there's one observing that thought, well, who is that? That's you. And speaking of thoughts, when we were doing that, what I observed was the sound of the air purifier over there.

[00:09:47] Nadir, would you do me a favor and you'll see a little dial on the front of that air purifier, if you could just turn it until it stops making noise because I realize the people watching on Instagram were going to hear that fan. And then, the other thing was, because I'm always curious, what's the mind going to come up with? And the other thing was, I was like, man, the big rule in radio is no dead air. I'm sitting there, going, my editors are going to see the waveform of this, and be like, what happened? We better squish this together, keep talking. It's hilarious, man.

[00:10:18]Sah D'Simone:  We listen to the silence, right?

[00:10:19]Luke Storey:  Yeah. Yeah, it's great. Those that are driving, listening to this are like, wait, what? Let's just bang it out. Let's get right into it.

[00:10:28]Sah D'Simone:  Yes, please.

[00:10:29]Luke Storey:  So, I've been reading your book for the past week. For those watching on video here, it's called Spiritually Sassy. And I have the special good friend galley copy. 

[00:10:41]Sah D'Simone:  Uncorrected copy. There are still mistakes in there.

[00:10:44]Luke Storey:  I didn't notice. I didn't see. I'm a control freak stickler for typos and whatnot, but, dude, it's amazing. And I just want to give you kudos for getting your second book done. I remember when we were in New York at the Ludlow, having lunch, and non-alcoholic drinks, and you were like, oh, I'm working on the second book, and you were telling me about it. And like, here it is in all its glory. 

[00:11:08]Sah D'Simone:  It's a long mission, honey. 

[00:11:11]Luke Storey:  I can only imagine. I'm in the beginning phases myself now, and I'm like, oh, this is no joke. I thought you just like sit down, and clank on the keyboard, and a book pops out. It's a whole thing. But I relate to this book and I think it's so needed right now because of its accessibility and simplicity. I know a lot of the stuff that I've read that's helped me over the years. I mean, there's one book by David Hawkins. It took me three years to read it.

[00:11:36] I mean, it's a powerful book, but it was so dense. And as I'm reading it, I'm going like, I don't know how many people there are that are this committed, you know what I mean? To have to really take 20 minutes to read one sentence until you get it. And so, I love books like this that have that same depth, but are in modern parlance and are just accessible. So, congratulations. And I normally don't do this, but I really want to dive into the book because there's so many like key points.

[00:12:03]Sah D'Simone:  Okay. Good.

[00:12:04] Yeah. And I took lots of notes. But before we get into it, because I know when I interviewed you before, we got a bit of your back story. And so, we'll put that in the show notes. People can go back and refer to that episode to kind of like, who is this guy? And we can fast forward through that.

[00:12:22] Actually, don't listen to that episode. I've just sworn so much. I've been telling all my students and everyone all the time, be consistent with your wild authenticity, like be consistent to change. Like three years ago, I was so different. Like I think the Dharma pool, when like the devotion to the practice has always been there. But listen to me now.

[00:12:48]Luke Storey:  Yeah, I understand that.

[00:12:49]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah. But unless you really want to, then give yourself the-

[00:12:54]Luke Storey:  Well, there is a great back story there about growing up in Brazil, and going into the fashion industry, and your first coming out as a kid. And there's a lot of power in that story. But I understand. I always remind myself any time I think I'm being really brilliant that like I'm going to listen back two years ago, what an idiot you were, you know what I'm saying?

[00:13:17]Sah D'Simone:  Oh, my God. Yeah. One of my mentor has said this to me, actually, she was like, Sah, I look at books I've written 20 years ago, and I'm like, what the F were you talking about, honey? Yeah. It's like, as long as you're putting out there and like your intention is to help others, I think it will help others.

[00:13:33]Luke Storey:  Yeah. So, let's dive into the first concept that I love, which is something I'm working on now, is coming out of the spiritual closet. What was that experience like for you? What does that mean? How are you doing it? How did you do it? How can someone who is a one story, orient them their life and themselves that way, but is kind of afraid to feel woo-woo, or weird, or be judged, and all that?

[00:14:03]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah. Such a good opener. Thank you for that. Coming out of spiritual closet is like making a commitment that you're not going to only and start there, right? Like meditate for 10 minutes in the morning, call yourself, and be like, I'm on a spiritual path, when you're not spiritualizing every air of your life. In Buddhist tantra, it says that we have to really use every experience that we have to transform our minds and open our hearts.

[00:14:28] So, coming out of spiritual closet, it's making a choice to live out the heart values, right? Like live with integrity. I think a lot of people are, this is the biggest part about coming out of spiritual closet, right? I'm one person when I'm with Luke Storey, I'm one person when I'm with Alyson Charles. It's not my style. But a lot of people who may be listening to this can relate that we have had to be one person at work, another person with our parents, another person with our partner, another person with this group of friends, another person with that group of friends.

[00:14:58] And coming out of the spiritual closet asks you to be so radically you across the board. And so, radically you across the board, it takes you to the edge, right? Because it's like, oh, wow, I've been pretending to be this, I've been resurrecting this old version of myself to please this person. I've been resurrecting this old version of myself to please this person, and then you've left yourself. You've abandoned, and neglected, and silence your most authentic self. 

[00:15:27] And only a glimpse of the people that you socialize and relate with get to see that. Oh, these are my spiritual friends, so I get to let the hair down, and talk about my heart, talk about my feelings, and talk about my internal weather, whatnot. So, coming out of spiritual closet, it's a radical choice to be your most authentic self at every interaction, no matter who you are interacting with. And when you're not, you know. I think that's a big thing.

[00:15:57] It's like when you're not operating from the high view, there's a glossary in the book because there's a lot of language that I've just like made up along the way. So, it's called the high vision, right? Living in the high vision. There's only the high vision or no vision. There's no middle ground because you can't have your code of ethics be like elevated, and you're generous, and compassionate, and kind only some of the time, right? And when you're not, you know. Spiritualized, coming out of the spiritual closet asks you that your code of ethics is elevated and you're operating from that place all the time.

[00:16:30] And when you're not, you know. There is this inner knowing, oh, honey, you're crunchy. Oh, honey, you're wobbly. And you've seen me wobbly. You've seen me crunchy. And then, you're like, Sah, let's do this, honey. Snap out of it. So, that's what the coming out of spiritual closet is, it's a radical choice. And that's why the book is Eight Radical Steps to Activate Your Innate Superpowers. So, that's foundation, radical choice to be consistent to changing, to your healing, not be committed to your lies. And just for context, the time, it was the fall of 2014. I was doing a 30-day silent meditation retreat in Kathmandu, Nepal. 

[00:17:12] And halfway through the retreat, I was sort of looking around people and everyone's having these breakthroughs, like howling, crying, the whole thing is happening. And I'm sort of judging everybody. I'm like, oh, my God, you guys must have been some real-life villains out in the world because you have all the stuff. And then, as the dust of my mind settled a little bit and the stuff that was sort of unprocessed sort of that was cleared and processed, started to arise and come to the forefront of my mind. And it was during that time that I said, oh, my God, I've been—can we curse? Okay.

[00:17:46]Luke Storey:  There's no way to talk about your book without cursing. The first chapter is like, these motherfuckers or something.

[00:17:54]Sah D'Simone:  That's right. Yeah.

[00:17:55]Luke Storey:  I'll give a warning to the parents. Sometimes, parents email me, pissed off, like why do you swear so much.

[00:18:00]Sah D'Simone:  That's right. Sorry.

[00:18:02]Luke Storey:  Well, no, I mean, I get it. And it's that fine line of being authentic and having a real conversation like we really would and also being mindful of other people's aversion to strong language. But I would prefer realness over self-editing to please others.

[00:18:19]Sah D'Simone:  Okay. Good. So, we'll stay in the high vision. So, I said, oh my fucking goodness, I've been an asshole. And that was a moment of awakening, I was like, oh, wow, I have caused pain to other people. I've caused pain to myself. And that moment it was like, oh, it shook the shit out of me. And then, during that retreat, at the end of the retreat, that's when I made a commitment. I want to be committed to my healing, not to my lies. I want to be committed not to this consistency, but committed to change, committed to like living in the high vision, transform my mind, energizing my body, opening my heart.

[00:18:54] And I talk about this a lot. It's like, it's one conscious choice that you can make that really redesigns a timeline of your life, one conscious choice. You can look yourself in the mirror, and say, and this is also with drugs and alcohol for me, I'm done waking up like completely in a fucked up state of mind. I'm done feeling like shit all the time. And it's one choice that you make that will have the potential to totally like redesign your timeline. So, this book is why we talk about radical and why I use some strong language. 

[00:19:28] It's to sort of shake things up a little bit, because I think across the board, we have sort of like forgotten why are we here and how do we go about this thing. And so, the book offers you a foundation to reenter life from this radical place of like, I'm a spiritually sassy motherfucker, honey. And as I walk into a place, I'm a permission slip for you to be that, too. So, in the first few chapters, you're really going to look at your shit and start to redesign your relationship to trauma, you start to change your relationship to your painful memories.

[00:20:11]Luke Storey:  Yeah, I really relate to that concept. Years ago, one of my teachers used to talk about being the same man wherever you go, no matter who you're with. And it was just like a really simple, understated principle. And his analysis of that was that that is integrity, that you're unshaken, and also, goes into that, you treat the busboy in the same way as you treat the manager or the owner of the hotel, as the bellhop, and treating everyone the same way, being the same way. It's like obviously me and everyone included never arrives at that perfectly.

[00:20:55] But I think that's a really good goal to have in life, is to just be you and own that authenticity. And I think on social media, at least, there's probably a few people doing it to the degree that you are. Every time I see you on Instagram, I'm like, damn, he does not give a fuck. Your TikTok is on another level. I'm just like, damn. So, for those of you that have not followed Sah yet on social media, you should, but I see you, and I'm like, oh, my God, he's so free. And I think that's what, really, would you say that freedom to be yourself in its fullest expression is kind of the goal of leading the spiritual life?

[00:21:33]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah, of course. Yeah, absolutely. I think the word freedom could be so far out, right? I mean, like within my lineage of study, like Vajrayana and Mahayana Buddhism, there's a law about stepping out of the cycle of death and rebirth. And that's a great concept and it's an amazing goal. And we should capitalize, aspire to totally like liberate ourselves. But in my work, it's really about having one good day, and then another good day. And how do we define a good day?

[00:22:10] It's like, your mind is at ease. So then, what lives in your heart? It's like, free to express. And when you're expressing, you're not worried about, oh, what is she going to say, oh, what are they going to say, not worried about judgment. And recognize that how someone sees you, it's completely based on the quality of their mind. And the quality of their mind is completely based on the kind of karma that they've been cultivating. And it's such a radical thing to check in with that.

[00:22:37] So, as I'm being free, as I'm going through the world and people saying, Sah, you inspire me so much, I want to be as free as you are. Honey, the freedom that you see in me is in you. I'm just a little bit of sunlight, a little bit of water, and a little bit of fertilizer to the seed of freedom that's already at the base of your being. The problem is we're watering seeds of suffering. We're watering seeds of blame. We're watering seeds of victimhood.

[00:23:00] We're watering seeds of all the unwholesome, is what we call it in the Buddhist literature, unwholesome, unskillful qualities. We're watering those most often. And we're forgetting, too, that the work is about getting rid of those actively, making that choice to get rid of these unwholesome qualities and developing the ones that live at the base of our being. So then, we're not afraid to laugh out loud or to dance in the supermarket when your song comes on.

[00:23:28] We're not afraid of coming in here and being in the highest vision all the time. I think freedom, it could seem so lofty, right? But when you bring it down, it's like a relaxed state of mind. It's an energized body and your heart is open. You're not closing off in the face of suffering. You're not closing off in the face of trauma. You're not closing off in the face of oppression. You're able to proactively stand up, and say, no. I think people also think that being on a spiritual path or being too deep into practice, they're going to become passive, bystanders to reality.

[00:24:10] That's the polar opposite, honey. That's the polar opposite. You really become an agent of change. So fierce that your presence alone could remind people of like, uh-uh, no, no, no, or like, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, just by non-verbally communicating change. It's possible. That's what the work offers. So, when we think about freedom, you can think about this lofty goal about being completely, not coming back again to the cycle of death and rebirth or you could just think about having one good day and doing one good thing. 

[00:24:45] That kind of a thing. So, I'm all about just being like right here, right now because when you experience suicidal thoughts, and depression, and addiction anxiety so regularly for so many years, thankfully, thankfully, for me and for everybody listening, it's possible to heal. It's possible to transform. No traumas too big that you can't heal. So, when you have that sort of like backstory to work from, I'm all about having one good day. If I can make it through this day and smile, then I'm good. And then, one day builds into the next.

[00:25:21]Luke Storey:  Yeah. Yeah. That's so true. I think that's one of the most potent principles in the 12-step movement is this concept of one day at a time. I remember when I first got sober, it was like, dude, I mean, in one sense, it's hard to remember what it was like, but then, it's just like right there, like it was two minutes ago in another sense. And I remember thinking, when I realized I would be best served to get sober, it was impossible to imagine going a few minutes, or a few hours, or a few days, let alone a few years without those crutches. And when I thankfully checked my ass in rehab, I'm like, what, you mean I can't smoke weed when I'm 50? 

[00:26:05] Now, I'm almost 50, I still don't smoke weed. So, I was like, not even weed? I mean, I'm cool with putting away the hard stuff, and they're like, dude, you're 26. Can you just stay here the rest of the day and not run away into the woods? Just today. And it was like, oh, well, there's only four hours left until midnight, so I could do this another four hours. And sometimes, it's one minute at a time, but it's a really great approach to anything that's challenging. And life itself, no matter who you are, into one degree or another, is challenging, right?

[00:26:41]Sah D'Simone:  That's right. 

[00:26:42]Luke Storey:  So, I like that. Like, well, let's not worry about enlightenment right now. Let's just stay right here. 

[00:26:49]Sah D'Simone:  Because enlightenment, my teacher talks about this a lot. There are 64 moments of choice in every blink of an eye, right? And every single moment, enlightenment is as close to us as our eyelashes. Did you get that? So, when we recognize that every single choice could lead us all the way to the furthest, most awakened state of mind and openness of heart, instead of thinking constantly about this far-reaching goal, think about doing things right here, right now that could water the seeds of enlightenment and the base of your being that will support the growth of this epic, gorgeous garden in your mind, that will be all representative of enlightenment.

[00:27:32] Instead of thinking about this lofty goal, think about right here, doing one good thing, one generous action to somebody. And one of my teachers talks about this a lot, it's like, you see, so often, people running, crossing over a homeless person on the street to get to a yoga class. That is the world that we live in today. And I said this the other day on social media, on TikTok actually, you can tell the depth of your genuine happiness by how often you think about the well-being of others.

[00:28:07] And it was kind of like a mixed bag of comments. Some people are like, oh, my God, this is so big, I'm so happy, thank you. And some people are like, hell no. And some people are like, what does that mean? So, we have to start thinking about that. Like this generosity of mind really dictates the depth of your awakening, how often you actually able to walk into a supermarket, and say, I don't like you, I like you, oh, you're this, you're that, enemy, like this completely not observing reality, but ripping reality apart with all of our added conditioning to it. If we can have a generous state of mind, generosity, it's called one of the paramitas, the perfections that we aspire to cultivate.

[00:28:56] And if we can walk into a supermarket, I use this example a lot because I think food could be very triggering for people, and seeing what's at the supermarket, the cravings, our old habits may show up. If you could walk into the supermarket and think about being what I call a blessing factory or an air purifier, being able to like alleviate the suffering for others, like really offer silent blessings everywhere you go, you're actually blessing yourself. Scientific research shows that if you think good thoughts, you're upgrading your body's chemistry, you're feeling better, you're sleeping better. So, therefore, your next moment will be better. Yeah. 

[00:29:41]Luke Storey:  In that regard, there's so much to unpack in there.

[00:29:46]Sah D'Simone:  Oh, my God. Did you fart, honey? 

[00:29:49]Luke Storey:  It wasn't me. Did Cookie put you on blast?

[00:29:52]Sah D'Simone:  I think so. It's okay.

[00:29:53]Luke Storey:  It happens every once in a while. She's got pretty good digestion because I biohack the hell out of her.

[00:30:00]Sah D'Simone:  Oh, you're sweet, honey.

[00:30:00]Luke Storey:  It wasn't me, just for the record. I would make it loud and proud if I was going to cut one on the podcast. What was I going to say? I was going to ask you about, oh, so what I'm hearing from that particular perspective is that this is more about the spiritual path, it's more about subtraction and letting go of what is false than it is about striving to get more and be more. 

[00:30:37]Sah D'Simone:  That's right. There's nothing to get, only to get rid of. And what's at the base of your being would just arise. It's called spontaneous arising. That's what the literature speaks to. And it's beautiful because you're able to test your material and surprise yourself. When you surprise yourself on the face of oppression, on the face of trauma, on the face of challenges that you're able to, I was telling you today, I moved homes today, and I'm still here, showing up in the high vision, honey.

[00:31:07]Luke Storey:  That's impressive.

[00:31:07]Sah D'Simone:  But you know what I mean? Like stuff like that, that I'm still smiling, unpacked the house just like quickly, sat down, and said, I'm going to meditate in this house because I want to start this vision right now. Boom. Dropped in, and then drove my ass here, singing, because I was going to see you do this thing. And that is the kind of thing, my friend, Jesse Israel, who us on tour with Oprah, I was hanging out with him a couple of days ago, and he was saying, Sah, like this is the depth of your practice, the fact that you can have all these things going on, a new book out, sign another book deal, you have to move homes, you're doing all these different things, and you're still able to smile, this is the depth of the work.

[00:31:47] This is when you know that the spiritual work is working. And I surprised myself that I'm still able to open my eyes in the morning, be like, oh, shit, I'm excited about today. That level, and it's not every day, honey. It's not every day, it's not every day, but when challenges are surfacing, there is a spontaneous uprising of support. I can rely on myself. And when you are in depression, and anxiety, and suicidal ideation for so long, you can't rely on your mind for shit. That's your worst enemy. So, to be on the other side of that and wake up, and be like, oh, wow, okay, I'm moving today, it's great. 

[00:32:23] Like that kind of radical shift in perspective, it really shows the depth of the daily practice, the moment to moment choosing to live in integrity, not have this cognitive dissonance where your thoughts don't match your words and they don't match your actions. And so many people live split like that. They think really good things, but they see really vicious things. And then, their actions, oh, my God, crack baby actions, you know what I mean? So, I think cultivating a high level of integrity, a high level of like making sure that your intentions match your words, they match your actions, will create so much ease in your body physiologically already, will start to create, like that. Oh, honey, it's a look. 

[00:33:12]Luke Storey:  Let's talk about the eight steps in the book because I reread them through today, and I was like, these are good. And I don't know, I love when teachings have like a numbered list of shit to do or not do.

[00:33:26]Sah D'Simone:  That's right. Yeah.

[00:33:27]Luke Storey:  I just think there's something really powerful in that. And everyone has kind of their version of steps, and yours are great. So, the first one, as you say, it is know your story to change your story. Break that down a little bit.

[00:33:44]Sah D'Simone:  Well, I think it's sort of a challenging step because it asks you to actually look at your shit. It actually asks you to pull out the spirit for me, or be like, oh, my God, I have been an asshole. Oh, my God, I have caused pain to myself and to other people. Oh, my God, I've been harboring on that thing that happened to me 10 years ago, I've allowed my pain to define my life. Oh, I've lived as the victim to my circumstances up until now. So, own your story to change your story is first being aware of what kind of life you've lived.

[00:34:16] But I don't do the thing that a lot of people that's sort of in the traditional setting of psychoanalysis asks you to sort of revisit that. And by analyzing the past, then you can make changes in the present. I don't do this at all. I just ask you to look at it to first take responsibility, And responsibility asks you to then go to the next level, to have compassion, to have forgiveness, to have regrets, and then make a commitment to do better, right? 

[00:34:48] So, know your story to change your story is just like, be aware of what kind of life you've lived. I think a lot of the times, we are unaware of the lives we've lived because we're so utterly distracted, that like years blur into next year, and next thing you know, it's like, you have a midlife crisis, you have your first stroke, and then you have a heart attack. And then, you're 75, and you're sour, and you're like, what the fuck happened to my life? This is that first step in the book, is like be aware of kind of life you've lived.

[00:35:20] And then, the entire book is a practice book. So, it's really going to ask you to be on the edge. Like go to the edge, look at the life you've lived, look at the kind of things you've done to yourself, and to other people. Not to go on the guilt trip, but to go on a trip of regrets, right? Because in Buddhism, regret is a really good thing because it asks you to go into the next stage, already seeking to stop the cycle of harm. So, that's the first step, in short. It's a very powerful chapter to open with.

[00:35:48]Luke Storey:  Do you think that there is a difference between regret and guilt? 

[00:35:56]Sah D'Simone:  I think guilt and regret, they have similar energy, there's a similar texture, but I'm just speaking through what I know from my training and my conditioning. Guilt could sort of be, have this like energy of really, it's disorienting, it's confusing. It really sets you up for you to be in a miserable state. And when you are thinking about regret, it's like regret is like, I feel guilty, and then. Regret has the and then, that has the and what am I going to do about it differently?

[00:36:43] Regret has that kind of energy, it's like, oh, I'm aware that I fucked up, I'm aware that I caused pain to myself, or I'm aware that I've caused pain to other people. And what, it's that choice to stop the cycle of harm. It's that choice to do something different. It's a choice to do better next time. And for me, to speak about the guilt or regret in the same sort of like this misperception, and I think Brittany Brown speaks about this very eloquently and beautifully. It's this misperception that our actions are a reflection on who we are at the base of our being.

[00:37:18] That's shame, right? Guilt is recognize that our actions are a reflection of our behavior. And our behavior does not define who we are at the base of our being. So, looking at all of these stuff and recognizing that as we get later on to other chapters, I speak about this a lot, it's like, your mistakes do not define who you are. And that's so liberating to know that. And this doesn't take away the weight of what you've done, but it gives you an opportunity to go, and then what happens after. Yeah.

[00:37:54]Luke Storey:  Yeah, so that it's not self-defeating and putting you in that shame spiral, of like, oh, my God, I'm such a loser. As you're saying that, I'm like, God, well, I guess they don't have school anymore because the whole world is shut down, which is probably a really good thing for society. Schools are largely like indoctrination. I don't know. Like many communist factories now or something. But anyway-

[00:38:16]Sah D'Simone:  I have something to say about that, too.

[00:38:19]Luke Storey:  But yeah, I mean, school didn't do me any favors, put it that way, but the school of life has taught me a lot. But I'm thinking, God, what a great lesson for kids. It's like just parenting or schooling, in that when one makes a mistake or an error, to indicate them and make them aware that it doesn't make them bad. It's like you describe that shame of being, there's something wrong with who I am.

[00:38:44]Sah D'Simone:  I'm a bad person.

[00:38:45]Luke Storey:  Yeah, versus that, I made a mistake and what I did was wrong, it doesn't make me wrong. And I'm like, God-

[00:38:52]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah, it's such a radical.

[00:38:53]Luke Storey:  ... if someone had taught me that when I was five, I would have a much different life. Took me a long time to learn that.

[00:38:58]Sah D'Simone:  Same here. I think that was such a foundation. And I've talked about this a lot. It was like, when I did my first ever 10 days silent retreat, I was up in the Himalayas, and in the first few days of the teacher, she wasn't speaking directly to me, she was speaking to the entire audience, but I felt that she was directly piercing through all my layers. She says, at the base of your being, everybody is good. And I was like, What, I'm a good person, I'm a benevolent person? 

[00:39:30] Wow. How come no one's reminding each other to like, hey, all of this stuff is the fluff and it's the conditioning. But at the base of your being, honey, you're a good human no matter how troubled of a life you've lived. I mean, maybe people were listening, it's like, yeah, whatever. Some people are really innately bad. That's something that I love about Buddhism, is that the Buddha spoke about this a lot over and over again, it's like, everyone at the base of their being is good.

[00:40:01] That is so freeing to hear. That's so like revolutionary and radical to think about the people that we despise the most, the people that we've put in the category of enemies, the people that we put in the category of, you are bad because you like these things and you do these things, you're innately bad. And that's not the truth. It's like, every human what connects us is their benevolence, not the harm we do. And when I heard that, I was like, oh, shit, I think I'm going to stick with this path for a minute because you're saying the things that I just innately knew.

[00:40:35] But growing up in a home where we were told to not like these people because they're this religion, to not like those people because they like these things, and they look like that. It was kind of jarring to hear this Tibetan Buddhist nun, who her presence alone was just like recalibrating the entire room. I have never felt someone nonverbally be like, you okay, bitch? That kind of thing. I want that. Give me that pipe, honey. I'm going to smoke your crack. That is the kind of thing that I've been able to experience in the presence of all these radical saints. And that's what I'm cultivating, is constantly checking in with myself to see if like, am I adding or am I subtracting kind of entry into every exchange with that mindset.

[00:41:24]Luke Storey:  Yeah. Yeah, that's beautiful. It's, I think, really difficult for many of us to imagine that even the most depraved humans on the planet at their core are good. I mean, I believe that as a construct, but it's difficult sometimes. It's difficult because of that innate desire of the ego of superiority, of like, I'm better than this politician or this person, and there's so much of that going on right now. The thing I have with that, because I'm going to get weird here.

[00:42:07]Sah D'Simone:  Oh, no. Just kidding. Please do it. Please do.

[00:42:08]Luke Storey:  No, here's the thing. I do believe that any human being is doing what they believe to be right in any given moment. Like no person, no matter how evil, and depraved, and horrific their behavior has been throughout history, has ever thought, what's the worst decision I could make today that's going to hurt the most amount of people? Let me do that. Even a sociopath, I think, is doing what they think is the best choice. So, there is an inherent kind of innocence to everyone. 

[00:42:37] And at the core, a good and, perhaps, those that perpetuate evil and wrongdoing on others have just been harmed and traumatized in their acting that out. That said, and this is going sound crazy, too, but I think there are people in positions of power in this world that might not be all the way human and might actually be devoid of love, and empathy, and possibly even incapable of having that because they are not true humans. That's another conversation for another podcast.

[00:43:16]Sah D'Simone:  Oh, my God.

[00:43:17]Luke Storey:  Yeah. But anyway, because I see that, but then, there's some people that I'm just like, they must not be human because they have zero empathy. They're psychopaths. And I guess all one can do is just pray for their well-being and that they will find God in one way or another. 

[00:43:38]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah. And they become free as quickly as possible. I mean, I'm just going to say it, like a guy like Bill Gates, I look at his empty eyes and there's just no soul there. Here's a guy who's like inoculated and sterilized all of these poor kids and people in Africa, and just done these horrific crimes against humanity, and is on TV in a pink sweater, when like, I'm going to save the world with forced vaccinations that I won't take or give my kids.

[00:44:03] And I'm just like, how do I find the compassion for that when I'm looking in those eyes, and I'm like, there is no God in there. This dude is a reptile, or a fucking alien, or like on some other shit, that there are certain entities that I just look at and I just feel this dead zone with. And I can't even find that, like, okay, there's humanity in there that I can have compassion for. There are some that I really struggle with, because on an energetic level, they just appear to be of another dimension almost. Anyway, going off the rails a little bit there.

[00:44:41] No. Yeah, honey. I don't have anything to comment in regards to that, but the only thing I do have to say, that as we continue to deepen our ability to be compassionate for ourselves, and there is going to come a point that we can be compassionate for the people who are causing the most pain to other people. I'm going to share just a tiny little story about this, the Buddha, actually, and I'm paraphrasing all of it, so everything I'm quoting about my teachings is I'm paraphrasing the F out of it, because it's my style to make them all sound sassy, too. 

[00:45:15] It's how my delivery is. But the story is like this, the Buddha created the Metta meditation that everybody knows. Sharon Salzberg populated it into the West, may I be happy, healthy, and save me, live with ease, that kind of a compassionate state of mind, right? Loving kindness state of mind as well. And he was asked that his disciples, this group of monks went to meditate in a forest that was hunted with all these hungry girls, with all these evil spirits, right? 

[00:45:46] And they said, we can meditate in there. The spirits are like fucking us up. We can't concentrate there. It's so scary and there's so much fear. And we want to just like jump them. And it's like just a bad vibe. The Buddha kept saying, honey, keep going, keep going. If you're just offering yourself the well wishes and you're not thinking about offering the well wishes to these people who are in these lower realms, and from your perception, these people who are devoid of humanity, of humanness and benevolence, the practice that he was asking them to do is to get to such a degree of practice that you're able to then offer them well, wish them well, wish these evil spirits to be well. 

[00:46:31] And then, they came back, and said, here we are. And then, that's when the Buddha said. okay, so like you've graduated from this teaching. And again, I'm paraphrasing for all of you who are like Buddhist nerds. I'm paraphrasing it, so you're aware. But it's very interesting story to know that like once we can actually enter into a prison, orient into a refugee camp or enter into a place or see somebody on TV who's so jarring, so triggering, so inflammatory for our system.

[00:47:01] And we can use them as a Buddha, use them as a guru. And we'll talk about this in the book, too, but really say, thank you for showing me my mind. Thank you for showing me my mind. Wow. That radical shift of perspective, then ask us to like, where am I lacking? How am I allowing my inability to expand compassion for the sake of all beings? In the mind of Vajrayana Buddhism, it's really about, everything we do is for the sake of all beings. No beings are left behind.

[00:47:31] And we're talking about birds in the sky, fish in the sea, small creatures, everything. No one's left behind. So, this is my comment onto that. It's like, there comes a point where we're able to see somebody who's so inflammatory for our system and we're able to expand, not contract, and be like, wow, I really wish you to be happy. You really mean like, oh, my God, and tonight, I'm going to dedicate my practice to you, genuinely wish you to be happy.

[00:48:01] And there is a radical change of perspective that takes place. I've experienced it with my own pain, with my own enemies, with my own difficult people, and then there comes a point when the mystical thing happens, the magical things happen, that once you change your perception about them, and I talk about this in the forgiveness chapter, there is a change of heart, and then you're able to—I'm not saying that you're going to see these people from your past life, from your past, in this life, and that you guys are going to become friends again, but there is a change that happens.

[00:48:38] Maybe you get an email, maybe get a text message, maybe get a phone call, maybe a friend of a friend who was with them says something nice about you, and it trickles down to your sphere. I've experienced this in my life. And the work is possible. We do this work with our eyes closed so we can be better humans with our eyes open. And at the same time, a lot of what happens and a lot of what reality is, it's not what meets the eye. So, a lot of this stuff is happening at levels that we don't have awareness with our senses to experience. So, that's my two cents in regards to that. 

[00:49:12]Luke Storey:  Yeah, I think that's really the crux of it, is like how do we shower our enemies with love, and true forgiveness at depth, while at the same time not condoning their behavior. So, it's like, how do I love a Bill Gates and not support his plan to depopulate five billion people off the planet because he's on some power trip? It's like, how do I fight against that without fighting against him? And I found it easy in my interpersonal life relatively. I mean, it wasn't easy at first, but I mean, people that have abused me, and neglected me, abandoned me, treated me like shit, betrayed me, I mean, and I've done many of those things myself, and will hopefully be forgiven.

[00:50:08] But I find it easier when it's a personal thing, it's like, I can find the humanity in someone to get to that level of unconditional love and forgiveness quite easy. It's more difficult for me when I feel that it's like so many lives are being destroyed and affected. That's a bit tougher, because then, it's like, well, yeah, if it's all love, and light, and forgiveness, then that means I'm like cosigning this person's psychopathic power trip against humanity.

[00:50:39]Sah D'Simone:  But we're not taking it away, though. Like in the Buddhist literature, talks about the two wings of complete freedom. It requires you to be wise and compassionate. You can't just be compassionate. Oh, he's in pain. He's an asshole. He's causing a lot of pain to a lot of people because he's in pain. Let me alleviate his suffering and let me do whatever I can to look like—that's good.

[00:51:01] But wisdom will help you to know the antidote to stand up, and say, this is fucked up. We're ending that. That's the wisdom component. And you can't just do one or the other, and with this internal work, with these internal changes, you're able to then have the—it says that the perfect antidote arises in the mind and the perfect antidote for the person who's suffering. I haven't glimpsed at that too much. I'm usually sort of like doing one or the other.

[00:51:37] But the offering is that, is that we cultivate enough merits that we do enough goodness within ourselves and in our lives, that there is an opportunity, there is an experience of unconditional compassion where no one's left behind with the proactiveness and the energy to stop when things were to—really say, enough is enough.Like this is not happening. In Buddhism, it talks a lot about like, if you were to stop this person who, through your perception, he's a bad person. His actions are bad, so we're seeing him as devoided of goodness, right? If you were to actually stop him, you're actually doing good for him because he's not creating more negative karma. So, it's actually like-

[00:52:28]Luke Storey:  That's interesting. 

[00:52:30]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah, I mean, there's some literature that says that the Buddha actually ate this meal and it was poisonous to him. And he died because he didn't want the guy that was serving the meal to feed all these other disciples and kill all these other people. He says, just kill one person, so your karma is only going to be in relation to one human life that you've killed, not all these other people. And we've talked about this before, with a friend of yours who's like, oh, I never asked for help. And you were like, no, honey, you got to reach out to me because you're helping me transform my benevolent karma, create good merit. So, it really comes down to that. 

[00:53:13] And I invite you to test your material, see the person who's most triggering, most inflammatory to you and use them as your object of meditation. See if you can like print a picture of them, that might be far out, put them on your altar for a week, you know what I mean? Like that's really the offering. It's like, put them on your altar for a week and just see if you can just like exercise your benevolence towards their well-being. May you be happy. May you be healthy. May you be safe. May you live with these, because we know that someone's causing pain to other people is because they haven't been cared for, they haven't been nurtured in their heart in some way or another.

[00:53:52]Luke Storey:  Well, it's interesting how you say that that person becomes a mirror for you. Because when I think about that particular entity, it's like, I think of myself as this unconditionally loving, like really kind person that is of service. And I mean, and sometimes, I think I'm a total loser and a dick, too, but that's improving. We all have our moments, right? But generally speaking, I don't think of myself as mean or hateful.

[00:54:17] But then, if I have those thoughts that are triggered by someone like that, I'll justify them within myself because it's about them. But really what it is, is it's like bringing out some of the worst parts of myself, where I'm having thoughts of wishing them harm, and hoping to see their demise, and failure, and punishment. So, there is like, the gift in that person is bringing out those kind of sticky places in me that I'm condemning them for, right? 

[00:54:50]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah. 

[00:54:51]Luke Storey:  Like I'm judging them for being so hateful, evil, et cetera. Meanwhile, I'm having those same evil, hateful thoughts toward them. So, that's really like there's a lot of internal projection going on. And I'm guilty of the thing that I'm accusing that person of, which I think right now, in the kind of climate of social justice, is really prevalent, too. I noticed that during the last election. There was a lot of this like, well, this guy is hateful, but we hate him and hate everyone that voted for him. 

[00:55:22] And I'm thinking, dude, the whole point is like, if you think someone's hateful, then more hate is not going to contribute to facilitating a solution. But we've been trained that way, to like blame other people for how we feel inside and blame other people for our misery or put other people in the place, you're the sole proprietor of my happiness. And we see this in romantic partnerships. We see this with governments. I mean, the variety of relations that we experience, this kind of blaming and blaming, being the victim, too, happens all the time. 

[00:56:01] And to just riff on what you said about like hating them, and it's you're recognizing this within you, it's recognizing that every single time you believe or you wear the suit of hate, literally, the hateful thought arise and you put on the full look, you literally put on the whole look, and you're like, it's not like, part of me feels hate, it's like, I am hate. Like we have no parts to ourselves. We are the hate.

[00:56:37] We're watering the seeds of more hate in the base of our being, so more and more of that will prevail. I love that in Buddhism, the metaphor of the garden is so used across every single thing because it really is about that. It's like, water the seeds that you want to see grow and weed out the ones that you don't. And then, when we see somebody who's like a clear mirror to what we need to work within ourselves, bring them to the altar, use them as the guru, and see what happens.

[00:57:09] Gates is my guru, those cold, dead eyes.

[00:57:15]Sah D'Simone:  Oh, my God. See what happens. See what happens. You practice sending him love for a week and just see what happens. And here's the offering, too, it's not that your relationship to him will necessarily radically change, but this unconditional love and compassion, it's going to show up in all these different areas of your life that you weren't even aware that you're withholding and contracted. And that's when you know like, oh, okay.

[00:57:39]Luke Storey:  Well, that's really funny. We just naturally segued into the second step in your book, which is learn to forgive yourself and those motherfuckers that hurt you.

[00:57:48]Sah D'Simone:  Oh, okay. This is the chapter that sold the book. This is the chapter that, because Sounds True asked for a simple writing, and forgiveness was my entry point into the spiritual path. I didn't know how to forgive myself or forgive other people, for just a little bit of context. And if you are going to listen to the old episode, I recommend you not, but I was born out of a company that I started when I was 23. I was 27. It was an international fashion magazine.

[00:58:20] And when I was 27, I was bought out of the company by my two best friends. So, the betrayal was so heavy. And when that got activated in me, then I started to realize how much pain I have caused them and I had caused other people by this interaction, by having had this trauma come up, then all these other areas of my life were like, oh, wow. This is just the, what do you call the cherry on top of the ice cream? Of all the shit that I've been doing through all these years that have been done to me or I had done to other people.

[00:58:55] And that's what led me on to then going to buy a one-way ticket, and be like, bye, girl, I'm going to India because I don't know what the fuck's going on. I don't have answers around here. But it was forgiveness. And I think forgiveness is the spiritual secret sauce that is so unspoken about. And in the 12-step, it's big, it's huge. I say it in the book, it's like Beyonce made cool to carry hot sauce in her purse. Forgiveness has to be part of your spiritual toolkit.

[00:59:34] And in the book, I speak about a spiritual fanny pack that you carry with you all the time. And if you are high-fashion queen, honey, make it Givenchy, I don't care whatever it is, visualize that it's like a high-fashion fanny pack, but your spiritual tools are there, and it's about you reaching into it all the time. And test your material. If you're able to forgive people for how they've treated you or for how they've treated other people, or are you still demonizing them, or pinning them to their pain, pinning them to their suffering because of the way that they go about the world.

[01:00:13] So, throughout the chapter, I speak about something that's kind of jarring for people to hear, is that forgiveness is an independent process. We think that if I do something, I fucked up to you and my benevolence, my goodness, I forgot that I hold this benevolence and this goodness. And because of the mistake that I made, I go into a shame spiral, I'm a bad person, I'm a bad person. Only if Luke says you're forgiven, then I get to reclaim my benevolence and my goodness. Have you ever experienced this in your life, where we rely entirely on having to talk to the person that we've done something fucked up to or that they've done something fucked up to us?

[01:00:55] It's only when we can meet face to face with these people that we are then able to reclaim our benevolence and rack in with our goodness, or them, and recognize that they're also a good person, regardless of what they've done back and forth. So, in the book, I speak about forgiveness being an independent process. Because unless you have a change of mind towards yourself, what you have done, and towards this other person, you're going to be leaking, inflicting, causing more pain, and you're going to be seeking somebody else to give you permission for you to become a good person. Does that makes sense? 

[01:01:28]Luke Storey:  Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. I mean, I think that that bondage, the chains that we keep ourselves trapped in by not forgiving other people, and then ourselves is like, there's no way out of that. 

[01:01:45]Sah D'Simone:  Sickening.

[01:01:45]Luke Storey:  Yeah, without that practice. Because then, it's not like people are ever going to stop doing stupid shit throughout your life because humans are fallible, right? And no matter like how cool someone is, and what a great person they are, and how involved they are, it's like, everyone has their human moments. And so, without having that as an ongoing practice, it's going to be a long, hard road. 

[01:02:09]Sah D'Simone:  And forgiveness asks you to say, and what happens next? Like how are you willing to be better now? And to just touch base briefly about this, there are three parts of forgiveness, and we can't forget that. It's like, forgiving yourself for the way you've treated yourself, asking for forgiveness of those that you've caused pain, and then forgiving those that have caused you pain. And in the book, I offer a variety of different exercises for you to really let go of this like grip. And when you start to do the forgiveness work, I swear to you, your perception of yourself and the world totally changes. Because when you are in this lack of forgiveness, you're going through the world like this. How do you call this? Like tunnel vision. 

[01:02:58]Luke Storey:  Yeah.

[01:02:58]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah, you're going through the world in tunnel vision. You're not aware of the beauty. You're not aware of grace. You lose sight of your curiosity. You lose sight of this wondrous nature that we have because of your tight grip to the past. And I say this in the book, too, people will say, the present, come back to the present moment. I close my eyes and I'll think about it, it's all about the past. It's all about this. So, learning to forgive will free you from depressive states of mind, from potential suicidal ideation.

[01:03:34] Like really, it could really completely, radically change your view of yourself and your connection to the present moment, just by choosing to do this work of like, okay, let me, and I say this in the book a lot, it's not a one time and done deal, honey, you know what I mean? You're going to do this over, and over, and over, and over, and over again. And the test will come when that traumatic memory visits your mind and you are able to allow it to pass.

[01:04:01] You're like, oh, hey, girl, I haven't seen you in a while. What's that, honey? And it passes. That's when you know that the forgiveness nectar has like fertilized the garden of your mind enough that it's like, oh. And then, you're not holding people hostage to their—you're not holding this tight grip to their mistakes, you're not demonizing them for doing fucked up stuff, because we all do.

[01:04:29]Luke Storey:  Yeah. And also, that bond with them and presuming that, oftentimes, when we're faced with the prospect of forgiving someone, it's not someone we want to be connected to yet through that addictive, repetitive.

[01:04:43]Sah D'Simone:  Oh, my God. Say it. Say it.

[01:04:46]Luke Storey:  We're now bonded with this person that we don't even fucking like a lot of the time, that we don't want to have any kind of bond or relationship to, but it's that stickiness of that, the juice that the ego gets out of that self-righteousness and that condemnation that keeps that person taking up real estate in our head.

[01:05:04]Sah D'Simone:  That's right. They own the penthouse, honey.

[01:05:06]Luke Storey:  They're not paying rent.

[01:05:07]Sah D'Simone:  They're not. Got to get the keys, honey. Like bye, girl, eviction notice at the door right now. And it really takes you to like have a few antidotes. Like as it arises, I forgive you. Forgive me. Maybe that's a mantra you whisper. In the book, we talk about letters. We talk about certain kind of forgiveness rituals. So, I can't say enough about this. Like forgiveness is the antidote for the spiritual path. It is the foundation foundation to the spiritual path. It's like the antidote to, a lot of your pain might be your inability to forgive.

[01:05:42]Luke Storey:  The third one, spray spiritual bleach on the belief systems that have hurt you. 

[01:05:49]Sah D'Simone:  I mean, if you just stop to think about like, look at all this, like the movement that's happening in America right now, like people have believed that if you have this skin color, you're a bad person or you're less than me. That's a belief system. You see somebody, a guy who likes guys, you're a bad person. That's the belief system. So, it's literally looking at your view of the world. And in the book, I ask you to do something very radical, which is like, actually, I ask you to look at very specific things that we all, across the board, having worked with with global celebrities, too, working with people pro bono, across the board, everybody has the same problems. 

[01:06:42] The wealthiest of the wealthiest to the poorest of the poor. It's just, their problems are just a little bit more decorated, and their belief systems are a little bit more decorated. So, this chapter really asks you to see your view of the world very clearly and see how often you are operating, how often now, and see that like that view is dictating how you see everything. And in this chapter, you put to your ads, because it's really asking you to be like, oh, honey, have you been thinking about these people?

[01:07:13] Because you think about this, and I've started interviewing a lot of powerful Black women in my IG, talking about, so often, you see a Black person walking towards you and you cross the street, you see a queer person coming towards you, and you're like, oh, they probably have this, and this, and that, or they're probably this, and this, and this. That prejudice, that bias, that belief system has been cooked into you and reinforced every time you believe it, every time you cross the street, every time you lock your doors, every time you see a queer person with long hair, I'm describing myself, with long hair and nail polish, I have no nail polish on today, but I usually do, and really express and flamboyant in his walk, you put me in a box, you label me, you write me off.

[01:08:02] You robbed me of my ability to surprise you, and that is a big problem. So, the belief system in the book is going to ask you to, the metaphor that I use is the house, right? It's like ,you have your spiritual awakening. All of a sudden, you wake up in this house, and you're like, oh, fuck, who furnished this house? Who built this house? This room here is my relationship to food. The next room right here is my relationship to my body. Then, the room next to it is my relationship to sex.

[01:08:33] And I mean, you name it. So, I use a metaphor of the house to ask you to look at your relationship that you have towards all these main pointers that we all, as humans, experience. And not to overgeneralize, but like 99% of the times, you're going to realize like, oh, shit, all these beliefs that I've been holding on to, and believing, and living by, they don't serve me. They don't serve the reality that I want to create. They don't support my dreams. They don't support my mission.

[01:09:05] They actually keep me stuck. And they actually keep me in this space of contraction. So, in the first chapter, we're looking at our own story. And then, the next one, we're forgiving ourselves and others. And then, the next chapter is to take a broader look at how you really see the world in yourself. What are the main? It's the views, right? The color of the glasses that we wear. And how often are we actually questioning the validity of them?

[01:09:39] And so, this chapter asks you to question the validity of it, and be like, oh, shit, this is conditioning. This is my, because of my past karma, because of my karma, this is the view I have of myself, this is the view I have of the world. Am I going to live like this? Am I going to continue entering the world like this every single day? Or, I'm going to make a radical to say, enough, honey. Enough is enough. So, that's what this chapter is about. It's funny to talk about it.

[01:10:11]Luke Storey:  Spiritual bleach, clean your perceptions and beliefs. 

[01:10:15]Sah D'Simone:  It's going to the house, honey, and spray the spiritual bleach everywhere enough, and then you built enough inner courage to then actually take out a hammer and break down the walls, and take all the furniture to the backyard and set the shit on fire. And you don't take your ass to IKEA, honey, or to Target to buy something from there, you build the table, you build the desk, you build the couch, you rebuild the walls of the house. And everything is a representative of your upgraded belief systems, the ones that support your awakening and the ones that think about the well-being of others.

[01:10:52] Is this belief system completely self-centered or can I expand and think about the well-being of others while I'm believing this about myself and the world? Is this altruistic in nature or it's not? That's a really good test. That's a really good test to the ways you enter the world. Am I just completely hoping that my own well-being is the most important thing or can I expand and think about the well-being of others while helping myself? That will test your edge.

[01:11:23]Luke Storey:  That reminds me of a book on Cabal I read years ago called Becoming Like God by Michael Berg. And the way that he defines ego, and I guess according to the Cabalistic teachings, is the desire to receive-

[01:11:39]Sah D'Simone:  They're really good.

[01:11:40]Luke Storey:  Yeah, right?

[01:11:41]Sah D'Simone:  Really good. 

[01:11:41]Luke Storey:  The desire to receive for the self alone. And I remember a lot of that book, but that one jumped out at me, and I was like, what, there's another way to live? Like why would you ever think about anything or anyone else? It's all about getting the shit you want, because then, you'll be happy, which is kind of where I was at that point.

[01:11:59]Sah D'Simone:  Me too, honey, for years, and years, and years. Oh, my God. Sah, the fashion queen, get out of my way, get the fuck out of my way. It's all for me only. Yeah.

[01:12:10]Luke Storey:  Yeah, that's beautiful. Okay. Next one is wake up your inner wisdom. Number four. 

[01:12:19]Sah D'Simone:  Wake up your inner wisdom. We're speaking about recognition that we have this all-knowing potential inside of us, right? I know I keep moving so much. I'm sorry. This chair is comfortable. Don't you fall over there. Wake up your inner wisdom. It really is about recognizing that we have this inner well of wisdom way beyond anything that we can ever quantify or like measure by intellect. It really goes to such a degree where you're able to do things that you are not trained in.

[01:13:03] You're able to speak about things that you have no context for. That is what this chapter is about. In this chapter, there's an exercise there, if I'm not mistaken, about the flow state, doing things that will help. And you do everything that I'm looking outside of this room right here, all the things that will help you to enter the flow state to physiologically create the perfect conditions to then awaken this chemistry, that then the mind operates from this place, where you're like surprising yourself with all the things you're saying, doing.

[01:13:36] So, this chapter is recognizing that we can live from this place, that we can do certain set of things every day that cultivate this inner guru, this wisdom that is so unconditional, so wild, that you are able to communicate things that you have no context for. As I said before, do things that you have no training for. And that's the offering. That's the offering, that like, you don't need to do, and I know this is kind of radical for some people, but you don't need to do 12 years of something. I have my whole view about, what's that book about becoming a master? You have to do 20,000 hours of something. What was that?

[01:14:17]Luke Storey:  Oh, yeah, Malcolm Gladwell. 

[01:14:19]Sah D'Simone:  And I think the guy's a genius and amazing, but I'm on the other side of it, saying like, honey, if you were able to create the perfect causing conditions regularly for you to tap into the flow state, you're able to like master things so much quicker, like so much quicker. And you really see it in people who are, I'm sure you slip into the flow state when you're getting ready for podcast, or as we're sitting here, as I'm teaching, this is my state of flow, I'm constantly being like, damn, girl, that was cute.

[01:14:54] Oh, look at this shit. You should write about this next. Like surprising myself, because these are the conditions, these are the perfect causes and conditions for me to actually like awaken this inner wisdom within me. And for everybody listening, we all have the chemistry for us to—the physiological, the neurochemistry for us, there's one that I love a lot, is anandamide or anandamid, I don't know the language, but the neurochemical is the bliss molecule. And there's a couple other ones that helps you think beyond, it's called lateral thinking.

[01:15:36] So, thinking beyond logic, right? The brain creates patterns in a way that's never created before. So, the potential's there for everybody listening. It's like, the most natural ways to do this, it's a service, helping others. Yes. I'm going to keep hammering up service, honey, because that is the path through, service, meditation, radical sports. The flow state, the flow genome, Steven Kotler is a work that I quote in the book. He's a genius, an amazing person. And the research started based on these people who were doing this, it's not radical sports, what do you call those people who do like-

[01:16:20]Luke Storey:  Extreme sports?

[01:16:21]Sah D'Simone:  Extreme sports. That's the word. Yeah. They were analyzing their brain, their chemistry while they're doing these things. So, how come these people can like stop time and do things in this beautiful, dreamlike way, and do things that, yes, they've been conditioned to do over and over repetitively, but they're always able to like go into the next stage, go into the next stage. That's the flow state. So, the inner wisdom is in relation to that. It's like, create the cause and condition for you to tap into the flow state, and then you're able to awaken this wisdom that you're like, whoa, girl, that was sick. So, natural things as meditation, extreme sports, service, these are some of the main ways for you to do that.

[01:17:10]Luke Storey:  That's really interesting. Because I bought into that 10,000 hours' thing, too. And because there is some shit that I've spent a lot of time doing and I've gotten decent at it just from the amount of time, but then, there's the whole quantum realm that you enter into in meditation, where there is no time, space, separation, there is no such thing as 10,000 hours in the void. And in the void is where all information from all the time exists, so I've never put those two together. That's really interesting. And that innate wisdom is universal, and it exists there, and doesn't require time and repetition. It just requires an access point. 

[01:17:50]Sah D'Simone:  That's right. And these things that we're talking about, the cause and conditions doing these things, I run every day, I dance every day, I meditate every day, I breathe every day, I eat in a certain way, I do these things, I talk to people like you regularly these are all things that create the perfect sauce for me to then have the access point, to then draw upon this wisdom and be able to deliver something that is like, oh, damn, that's the offering. So, this chapter's about that.

[01:18:17]Luke Storey:  That reminds me of when a musician that's not that proficient writes a really great song. It's like, where's the 10,000 thing there, right? 

[01:18:27]Sah D'Simone:  That's right.

[01:18:27]Luke Storey:  It's like, they're tapping into that thing. There's a famous story that Keith Richards tells about the song, Satisfaction, right? Super famous riff. The story, according to him, the legend is that he dreamt that riff, woke up in the middle of the night, played it on guitar, or maybe sang it, I don't know, and recorded on his little recorder in the late '60s or whenever it was, and then woke up, and was like, oh, let me play that thing, was it any good? He's like, shit, good riff. It turns into one of the best rock songs of all time. And that didn't require time. That required tapping into that Theta or Delta dream state, where access to all melody exists, right? Really interesting perspective. Next one is Name Your Superpower. I like this one a lot.

[01:19:18]Sah D'Simone:  This one is you figuring out like, what is your secret sauce? What makes you you? For me, it's my ability to communicate spiritual concepts in a really relatable, digestible, sassy way. That's my secret sauce. So, in this chapter, there's a series of exercises that asks you to actually recognize what's unique about you because there's something unique about you. And I talk about this a lot. It's like, how do you creatively offer what's in your heart? That's your superpower.

[01:19:50] So, this whole chapter is about that. And often, I speak about the purpose of human life is to transform the mind, energize the body, open the heart, and creatively offer what's in your heart. And the keyword, creatively offer what's in your heart, because that's what's your own unique way of offering the Brahma Viharas, the four qualities of the heart, love, compassion, wisdom, and joy. How are you going to communicate that into the world? And your superpower may come in me speaking with sass, with playfulness, with lightheartedness, with passion, and fire. 

[01:20:27] It may be for somebody making jewelry. You look at beautiful jewelry and the person's making it from that heart-mind awakefulness. And when you see it, when you land your eyes on it, you're like, oh, my God, it just moves you in a certain way, or when you listen to a song coming from that place, the chapters all make sense, honey. I'm like, yeah, that's good. They all sort to connect. They all sort of know. They totally do. I haven't like taken a good look at the book in a while now.

[01:21:01] So, finding the thing, your own unique way of offering what's in your heart. You could be plating a food, being an amazing chef. And when I look at that, it inspires something in me. You could be an epic podcaster like yourself, where every single podcast just lends. You have the perfect questions. It could be your unique way of conveying what's in your heart. It could be your own unique way of conveying love, compassion, wisdom, and joy. Whatever it is, a photographer, looking at this beautiful photo, it really can inspire you to change your life.

[01:21:35] One photo, one movie, the way somebody cuts somebody else's hair. You see a haircut, somebody could cut hair, and not taking it away from it, I think it's a legendary art form, but the way somebody can cut somebody else's hair, and you see that person, that person's hair, maybe when you're driving, you stop on a red light, and you see that, the way that person cut their hair, the way that person styled their hair, that in itself could put you on to do something epic with your life. So, you could express your heart in a variety of different ways, but you got to recognize that there's your own unique way of doing it. Does that make sense?

[01:22:17]Luke Storey:  Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. I don't think a lot of people have ever discovered that because of all the limitations that we put on ourselves. I think it's a huge gift to be able to find the one thing that makes you uniquely weird and awesome. 

[01:22:36]Sah D'Simone:  That's right. And please, everybody listening, recognize that you do have this. There is a creative genius at the base of your being. It's just, we forgot.

[01:22:45]Luke Storey:  Amen, brother.

[01:22:46]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah.

[01:22:48]Luke Storey:  Six. We've got three more to go.

[01:22:49]Sah D'Simone:  Oh, my God. Okay. 

[01:22:51]Luke Storey:  Yeah, I know.

[01:22:52]Sah D'Simone:  Power through. Where are we at? 

[01:22:56]Luke Storey:  A couple of minutes.

[01:22:58]Sah D'Simone:  Okay.

[01:22:58]Luke Storey:  We're alright.

[01:22:59]Sah D'Simone:  Okay. 

[01:22:59]Luke Storey:  I've never actually done this with someone's book, like allude to a couple of concepts or something. But I don't know, I just like the way you laid this out, was super cool.

[01:23:08]Sah D'Simone:  Oh, thank you, honey.

[01:23:09]Luke Storey:  Yeah. And so, as I was prepping the notes I was like, I actually just want to like cover a bunch of stuff in here because it's cool. I normally don't do that because I don't want an interview to sound like a commercial, tell us about your book. It's not what it's like. We're homies, like this is the shit we'd be talking about. But if you came over and there were no mics on, I'd be like, dude, that's sick, I like how you laid that out, we would be talking about it.

[01:23:31]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah, you have such an interesting, your secret sauce, that's why you make such a great podcaster, because your view of the world, the things that you're curious about are just like so interesting, that you hold on to specific things, and you were able to articulate that question, and the things. It's a look, honey.

[01:23:55]Luke Storey:  Thank you.

[01:23:55]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah.

[01:23:55]Luke Storey:  Thank you sir. I'll take it. I'll take it and internalize that. Next one is, believe you are amazing.

[01:24:04]Sah D'Simone:  This is kind of like maintenance. And I know there's a maintenance chapter later on, but this is already where you are choosing to say, bye, girl, to your old—like you're taking time off from people, places ,and things that are no longer supporting your awakening. You're choosing to, I mean, in my case, I need to take time off from my family, spending time in India, Nepal, Indonesia, Thailand, and responding sporadically because I was like trying to recalibrate my nervous system, trying to change my mind instead of constantly be walking in a minefield. Is that what you say?

[01:24:46]Luke Storey:  Yeah.

[01:24:47]Sah D'Simone:  So, you have to take time off. And believing that you're amazing, it can be really hard for people when they are awakening, and transforming, and doing this work. And then, all of a sudden, their mom says one thing, and then they go all the way far backwards because they are completely touching on that soar, and then turning it around, and around, and around. So, believing you're amazing, I speak about that, about like the closer relations, that the closest people that you have and how much access they have to like trigger the shit out of you.

[01:25:19] So, believing you're amazing is like choosing to stay in a high vision and what to do. How do you walk on this minefield while staying in the highest vision? How do you live with integrity when everyone around you is still operating from a completely different mindset? How do you walk out on the street when everyone, all of your neighbors are still getting drunk, and high, and doing all this kind of fucked up crack baby looks, and you are sort of, you're really wanting to like be an agent of change, change the world, help yourself, help others.

[01:25:49] And everyone around you is just like, oh, my God, this does not represent who I am like, but I still have to be here. Choosing to believe in your amazing is just a constant reminder that like, keep going, your external reality will match your internal world soon enough. And that is so, so important. I mean, honestly, the level of abundance that you have in your life is a complete, utter reflection of the quality of your internal world. And then, this chapter also talks about this a lot.

[01:26:20] It's like, imagine if you put as much effort that you have in creating external success, into creating internal freedom. How much of a life change would that be? So, in this chapter, I was telling you like, girl, you're good. I know things are crazy. Now that you have your eyes, now that you don't have so much dust in your eyes, now that you don't have so much, your eyes are not so dirty, your body is a little bit more energized, your heart is a little bit more open, and you're able to see reality a little bit more clearly, stay in high vision, honey. You got this.

[01:26:51] And soon enough, your internal world will dictate how you experience your external reality. And the next degree of that, your external reality will be a complete reflection of your internal world, where you're hanging out with high vision people. I mean, every single one of my friends are high vision people now. And every single one is a spiritual teacher in their own ways. One is an artist. But everyone is dedicated to the message, to the Dharma, to their transformation, to the helping out the world. This just doesn't happen overnight, honey. This is like years in the making where I can look at my favorite people, I'm like, all of you motherfuckers are high-vision beings, fuck. This is the work.

[01:27:31] Totally. 

[01:27:32]Luke Storey:  Yeah.

[01:27:32]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah, I love that. It's like, when you build the scaffolding of resonance, energies in people, and lifestyle choices, and behaviors, and then I want to see if you went through this. I'm assuming you did based on what you just said. But it's like, you build this gravitational field of the kind of people and the kind of vibe you're hanging around, right? And then, you have some kind of awakening or some pivot, some gift, a glimpse of enlightenment or change.

[01:28:07] And then, you start to Change. And then, the people that are used to you being one way do not like that. And sometimes, I think purposefully, perhaps not always consciously, but purposefully, trigger you into being back your old self, because they're like, wait, who the fuck is this guy? Like you're Mr. Spiritual and Positive now? Like come back to the circle of hate with us.

[01:28:29] That's right. Let's complain. Let's gossip. 

[01:28:31]Luke Storey:  Where it's familiar.

[01:28:32]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah. Let's get fucked up. What are you doing?

[01:28:34]Luke Storey:  Yeah. So, it's like the gravitational pull that wants to like drag you back toward that as you start to change. And sometimes, the pole gets stronger and stronger, the more light you start to cultivate within yourself.

[01:28:48]Sah D'Simone:  That's right. Oh, my God. I've lived through all of that, so much. And even the times I came back from India, and will go to my parents' house, and, oh, my God, just everyone around there, doing all kinds of like unskillful things, and I was like, oh, shit. But then, it was the depth of my work, transforming that relationship to that. But it's stay strong, honey. If you're listening to this, and you are in the spiritual path, and you're waking up, and you're recognizing that the old friends, the people who were around you no longer match the kind of values you hold, the kind of life you want to live, stay in the high vision, believe you're amazing because you are. And you choosing to transform your mind and open your heart, you're helping everybody else to awaken as well. You're becoming the light for all these people who are walking through the field of darkness. So, stay in the high vision.

[01:29:39]Luke Storey:  Amen.

[01:29:40]Sah D'Simone:  Yes.

[01:29:40]Luke Storey:  Number seven, use what you have.

[01:29:44]Sah D'Simone:  Use what you have. And what's after that? 

[01:29:46]Luke Storey:  After that is slay slaying.

[01:29:48]Sah D'Simone:  Okay. Stay slaying, yeah.

[01:29:50]Luke Storey:  Oh, stay slaying. Yeah.

[01:29:51]Sah D'Simone:  What's this one? Yse what you have.

[01:29:54]Luke Storey:  Seven, use what you have.

[01:29:55]Sah D'Simone:  Use what you have. We forget how resourceful we are. So huge, right? Everybody has a friend of a friend who works for the publisher or has written a book before. I'm talking about people who want to write books. Like I never thought about writing books. Everything that I'm doing, it was never planned. I never set out to leave for India, and then I'm going to become a spiritual teacher. No way. I was so selfish. I was doing everything for myself. I wanted to feel better. 

[01:30:19] But my teachers were quickly like, oh, honey, you should start going deep because you're going to be sharing, you're going to be teaching. I was like, no, no, no, no, I'm not. I guarantee you, I'm not. I'm in it for me. And then, of course, naturally, your mind starts to change, starts to open and altruism becomes more of your default. But resourcefulness is our inability to recognize how resourceful we are. This chapter is a recognition of how resourceful we are. 

[01:30:46] There's a cousin who works for this person. There's a friend who does that thing. We all have resources. You could be in the worst of the worst of the situations. You can have an extremely challenging background. But if you zoom out from the pain, if you zoom out from the suffering, if you zoom out from the victim mindset, it's in that zooming out, in this loving awareness of challenges, of trauma, of difficulty that you recognize like, oh, shoot, there is resource.

[01:31:18] The guy who works at the corner actually has done this thing, and he actually makes music on the side, and I really want to make music, so let me go talk to him. But we're so caught in this like small view of ourselves and small view of the world. Our misperception of ourselves, sort of misperception of the world is said to be one of our biggest causes of suffering. So, resourcefulness is huge. And I say to people all the time, make a list of 10 people in your life right now who can help you get to the next stage in your life.

[01:31:49] You'd be surprised. You'd be surprised that these people exist and they're right there. And guess what? You've said this to me because of what your friend said. Give meaning to their lives by asking them to help you. You're not saying, yo, honey, let me get all these things and give me an hour. No, no, no. This chapter. I talk about the 15-minute coffee date. In this case, we can. So, 15-minute, in the COVID pandemic world, you're not meeting the person, so take time to talk to people in Facetime and call them. 

[01:32:25] Fifteen minutes, everyone has 15 minutes. And I give fifteen minutes to people who write me a very genuine message on Instagram or on TikTok. I'm more than happy. And we know the texture of someone who's like genuinely curious, who's genuinely wanting to go to the next stage in our lives, and the people who are just wanting for us to say, you're good, honey, you're amazing. Like it's just a completely different texture. Someone who wants to progress and someone who wants to be validated. So, this chapter is about that. Awesome. 

[01:32:56] Yeah. 

[01:32:57]Luke Storey:  Last one, stay slaying.

[01:32:59]Sah D'Simone:  Stay slaying, it kind of leads into this, too. It kind of leads into the next one. But space laying is, it's really looking at fuming airs in our lives, looking at our spiritual path, like, what is it? What are the things that you do? And it kind of leads back to the first, coming out of a spiritual closet. But then, this is sort of looking at like the spiritual practices, your relationships, the flow state, and movement. Like looking at forming areas, forming these four pillars in your life, how often do you tap into the flow state? 

[01:33:35] How often are you nurturing your relationships? How often are you developing your path? How often are you moving your body? Looking at these forming areas, these four pillars, and based on that, and I'm talking about the four main pillars, in the book within each of these four pillars, there's many subcategories. But just to get people excited to get the book and do the work because it's a fun chapter, it would ask you to really look at all these specific areas in your life, and see if you're lacking, and put more time towards it. 

[01:34:10] And then, there is like a very specific, really fun, also, kind of like advanced meditation techniques in there to get you to, and I say this in the book, too, it's like some of these practices are, if they don't land for you right away, carry on with your life, and then come back. So, this chapter, it's really asking you to look at these main pillars in your life and make sure that you're watering those seeds regularly, that you're not just doing your spiritual practice for you, being intoxicated with your self-care, with the good feelings of your self-care practices, because it's so good, right?

[01:34:53] We're in meditation. I'm going to use you, for example, but I know you don't do that because you have such altruistic nature to you, but you can go from your hot bath to the other thing. You have all the self-care trinkets to play around, and go, you have a Dharma palace here. You have all the things. Same thing in my new home. I'm going to create all these little hubs for self-care, for a spiritual box. But if you're not using that energy to then support you to tap into the flow state, if you're not using the flow state to then create epic things into the world.

[01:35:25] If you're not then creating things to have better relationship with others and moving your body while you're doing all these things. And I'm not talking about dance exercise, I'm talking about the way you eat. Then, you miss the plot of the spiritual path. So, that chapter is going to be like, okay, honey, you know all this shit, you've looked at all the stuff, you've done all this amazing work, and now, here's how you know, here's how you can tell if you're going to stay slaying, is if you have these main areas in your life unlocked then if you're like that with them.

[01:35:57]Luke Storey:  The last thing I want to ask you about before I do my final question is-. 

[01:36:01]Sah D'Simone:  Oh, there's no like—okay. Keep going. Don't let me ask you. 

[01:36:06]Luke Storey:  I want to know, as someone who, I've played music for a long time, musician and bands for maybe like 15 years or something, right? And so, my relationship with music is deep. I love music. It's moving. It's transformative. But one thing I've never been inspired to do is dance. Like my body just does not get the sensation that it wants to move and gyrate in different ways when there's music on. And I think it's partially because I spent a lot of time with the bass in my hands, and yeah, every little way of grooving. But your hands are busy so you never learn how to, what do you do with this? So, even if I tried to dance, I'd be like, what do you do with your damn hands? They're usually doing this.

[01:36:47]Sah D'Simone:  That's right.

[01:36:47]Luke Storey:  But like when I watch you on social, on your TikTok, and Insta, and stuff, like your shit is like you are going full-on dance party, 100%, absolutely less than zero fucks given, just doing the damn thing in all kind of different crazy outfits and stuff. And I look at your Insta, and I'm like, oh, my God, this dude has balls, man. Seriously, it's like, yeah. So, I mean, a part of it, I'm going to guess, is like you're Brazilian, you're expressive. Like I've been to Brazil quite a bit. People down there, like they're in their body. It's a cultural thing. But what's your relationship with dance and how does that tie into your spiritual practice?

[01:37:29]Sah D'Simone:  Well, dance has actually, we saved sort of like a big question for the last bit, but like when I started to really connect to dance, that's when spiritually sassy was born. When I started to post me dancing in my underwear with the epic kimono, and at a hotel that faces Dalai Lama's temple in the Himalayas, and I'm talking about the importance of checking in with other people, like the tools to check in with people who are experiencing suicidal thoughts, that was the real marking of like, oh, this is what spiritually sassiness is all about.

[01:38:12] So, to answer this question in the sort of like a short version of it, it's like, music connects people. It moves you. I guarantee you, if I put some music on now, honey, you'll be moving, okay? Like everybody has got rhythm. Rhythm and music is like a natural thing for all of us. As you're holding the guitar, I'm sure that back in those days, it was more rock and roll music, but I have a sick playlist, honey, that's guaranteed to move everybody.

[01:38:40] So, dance, spiritually sassiness, being spiritually sassy, it's all sort of like connected. It was like that really big change of heart, so like, oh, wow, I can be a spiritual teacher and I can still dance flamboyantly. I can put on a woman's look and still use music to talk about really, really deep, powerful topic. And that's what drew Sounds True into wanting to work with me and publish this book because of that. And I said to them often, it's like, it's my job to make spirituality sexy.

[01:39:12] It's my job, it's my dharma to seduce people to taking care of themselves, that's what it takes me dancing. And dance brings joy. It reminds me of what's at the base of my being. I'm not so caught up in my conditioning, in my mental tendencies, and my mental habits. I'm in my body. I'm inhabiting the present moment. And from that present moment, what happens? The Brahma Viharas arise, right? The qualities at the base of your being shine bright. So, dance. I can't say enough about dance.

[01:39:48] And when you dance and you're constantly cultivating presence with dance, like you're not just moving here, and thinking, oh what do they think about me, and what is she thinking about me or what is it? Oh, I don't like this song. What do I try to do with this hand? If you feel caught up in the story still, you're not doing the work, as you could use dance to transform your mind and open your heart. But this is why in the Sah method, the technique that I created, helps you, we first use a traditional meditation technique for you to cultivate presence by touching base with the feeling of the breath.

[01:40:23] And then, you use ecstatic dance to really just cultivate that presence in action, right? Because at the end of the day, every single teaching is asking you to be meditation in every single area of your life. It's not to stay with your eyes closed and think. That path works for some people, but the tantric Buddhist path that I'm that I'm studying, it asks us to turn everything into a meditation practice. And it will be dictated by the quality of your attention. How could you give undivided attention to Luke? Why are you still dancing? Or, to whatever it is or to developing your heart as you're doing movement. So, dance, I can't say enough about it. 

[01:41:09]Luke Storey:  When you're in your full expression, in the way that you are, and I said like, follow him on social, and you'll be like, wow, he's super full. That's full of expression. It's amazing. When you're in that, I mean, I assume most people that follow you are feeling you and they're like down with your whole situation, but being so like, I guess, free, do you get haters and trolls on social media?

[01:41:34]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah, of course. Especially now that I have videos on TikTok with like 800,000, a million views, stuff like that. And then, the comments are, it's a completely different kind of space that I'm in. Like multiple videos with 800,000, 500,000, 600,000 views. And then, a lot of comments are like, oh, my God, oh, my God, you inspire me, I love you, blah, blah, blah this is amazing. And I can't reply to all the comments because it's a full-time job. 

[01:42:07] And then, there's the vast majority of people who are loving it. And there are people who's like, oh, my God, you are an abomination, you should die, you should kill yourself, you're horrible, you're this. And I teach the Sah method regularly on Deepak Chopra's company, Chopra Global on their IG account. And they have a large following. And when I go on there, it's funny you bringing this up, because the last two weeks, there has been an enormous amount of trolls coming into this place.

[01:42:40] And I'm just constantly reminding people, hateful speech, it's a complete reflection of their hateful mind. Their hateful mind is completely a reflection of their hateful past actions. But again, as soon as I got off the live today and last week, I was talking to my mom and in talking to my sister, and I was like, this is like, I'm in a high vision, I'm serving the looks, I'm delivering the dharma, I'm living my dharma, but it's sticky, that energy, especially someone who's had to like overcome queerness, and really make friends with my queerness, and love my queerness, and inhabit it and embody it as my dharma.

[01:43:24] It's sticky and it could be a little disorienting if you get caught in it, especially in the thread that everybody's sending love to each other, and then there is a couple of fuckers saying, and it's like, oh, honey. But, in the past, a couple of times, I've stopped the live, not on the ecstatic posts, and I'm just like, whatever, just delete the comments, and then block them. On TikTok, I don't because it's a little bit overwhelming when things go viral. It's like, how do you handle that? This explosion of interaction.

[01:43:56] But on the lives, I will stop the music, and I'll say, honey, recognize that this hateful speech is a reflection of your mind, and then not to call them out, you, user, X, no, I'm not saying that. I'm not using that, kind of zooming in to you and laser focus on you, but excuse me, I'm addressing the larger scale of like hateful speech. And this leads me to a last point about, in traditional Buddhist literature, it says, there are 10 ways to create the most harmful karma, and four of them are done with our speech. Four. It's almost half.

[01:44:37]Luke Storey:  Wow.

[01:44:37]Sah D'Simone:  So, thinking about it from that perspective, so I've been really good at like the sliding, doing the matrix thing, where I'm like, you can let your hate all come, I'm going to slide right by. And sometimes, I get caught. I got caught. And then, I talk to their team, and I said, honey, you need to have a team of people on the live deleting comments, because I still want to have the comments available when I'm doing these things with a large audiences because I want people to interact with each other. I want them to share what's happening, how things are transforming inside of them, but it really is. I'm putting myself out there in a way that is liberating for me, but I also know that my liberation could be triggering for people. But it's a risk I'm willing to take. 

[01:45:27]Luke Storey:  Good for you.

[01:45:27]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah.

[01:45:28]Luke Storey:  Thank you for doing that.

[01:45:30]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah.

[01:45:30]Luke Storey:  But I love the observation that you add here that the person who is so filled with hate, it's like, I was talking to a friend the other day and he had broken up with his girl. And he said, man, I'm just so heartbroken. I just loved her so much. And I said, man, you just love. That love is yours. She didn't take your love. Like that's your love. And by contrast, is it not true that when somebody is filled with hate, and they're trying to hand that hot potato of fucking hate to you, that's their hate, right?

[01:46:10]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah, put that shit on the floor, honey, I ain't carrying that shit.

[01:46:13]Luke Storey:  So, it's like, we only get infected when we pick it up, and we're like, that triggers our little hate neural pathway, and we're like, let's lock horns with this fucking toxic person. But that, it is much easier for me to have compassion on like hateful people like that. I mean, I think I'm pretty tame compared to the shit you're putting out there, so I don't get trolled as much, I think, I would imagine. 

[01:46:37]Sah D'Simone:  Even with all the things you talk about on the podcast? 

[01:46:39]Luke Storey:  Here and there, you know what I mean? But not much. I mean, sometimes, I get trolled for being born as a White male, and I'm like, I can't help it, I'm sorry. Talk to my parents, they shouldn't have fucked.

[01:46:51]Sah D'Simone:  Well, the literature says that you chose them. 

[01:46:53]Luke Storey:  Right. Exactly.

[01:46:55]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah.

[01:46:55]Luke Storey:  So, it is my fault. 

[01:46:57]Sah D'Simone:  The literature says that you actually chose them. You're walking, and you're like, this is the people that can help me exercise my best qualities and help me develop.

[01:47:05]Luke Storey:  So true. So true. And God bless my parents. They were were and are great teachers. But anyway, back to the point is, having been someone like you who lived completely entrapped in a hateful, sadistic, torturous mind for so much of my life, when a troll pops up in my world or my feed, a lot of the time, thankfully, I am able to see like, oh, shit, that's a projection. Those words, or that typing, or the email, or whatever it is, that comment is literally like a movie camera projecting on a screen what's happening inside their heads, because I know, because I've lived. I used to just walk around just hating everyone.

[01:47:47]Sah D'Simone:  That's right.

[01:47:47]Luke Storey:  I mean, I didn't need a reason for my prejudice. I just hate all peoplem, you know what I mean?

[01:47:53]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah.

[01:47:54]Luke Storey:  Unless you have something that I want, you know what I'm saying? I mean, I was really like that.

[01:48:01]Sah D'Simone:  That's right.

[01:48:01]Luke Storey:  And so, I know what it's like to be so filled with like that rage. And so, it makes it easier for me to arrive at compassion. I still block fuckers, don't get me wrong, but it's blocked and blessed, that's what I call it.

[01:48:13]Sah D'Simone:  Oh, that's sweet. Blocked and blessed, honey.

[01:48:14]Luke Storey:  You can steal it. #Blockedandblessed. Well, Derrick has block party. Derrick lives right up the hill right here. I don't know if you know that. Yeah, he lives like you could throw a rock at his house. Yeah, it's a good, good area right here. But anyway, it's like, I just project. And I learned this from David Wolfe actually, really. I interviewed him, and he's like, he's UFOs, like flat earth, I mean, he's really out there with the shit he talks about. I think it's amazing, but he gets trolled pretty heavily. And I was like, dude, how do you deal with like that much bad energy coming at you? And he's like, oh, Luke, I just imagine what it's like to live inside their head, I just know how much that's got to hurt.

[01:48:51]Sah D'Simone:  Genius.

[01:48:52]Luke Storey:  And so, I just really feel for them, and I pray for them, and I just have compassion. I was like, damn, bro, okay, that's something to aspire to, but that's where it clicked for me. I was like, oh, yeah, because I remember when I was the guy who would get on, and even just like, and it's because of what was going on inside me. And it's like, those people, really, the only thing that's going to pull them out of that is just love and like responding with love. Like what would the Dalai Lama do? Would he be like, fuck you, too, man. He'd just be like, politely shut the door, thank you, goodbye, or maybe not, maybe he'd be like, tell me about it. Why am I wrong? I'm not quite there, but I think that's a beautiful perspective. 

[01:49:32]Sah D'Simone:  It's radical.

[01:49:33]Luke Storey:  It is, it's like back to your forgiveness. And also, it's like the thing, I posted this meme I found, I wish I made it up, but I didn't, but it was the yin yang sign, it said, do no harm, take no shit.

[01:49:46]Sah D'Simone:  So good.

[01:49:47]Luke Storey:  And it was in response to some of the racial things going on,and it's just where I was at that moment. And what I wanted to say, it encapsulated that perfectly, is like, don't fight, you can't fight aggression with aggression. You can only raise the vibration in the consciousness. And also, not taking any bullshit at the same time. So, yeah. I love that. And I admire your courage to just do you, and do your thing, and just be free. It's fucking inspiring, dude. Every time I come across your social.

[01:50:18] I'm like, God, that's such an inspiration for me, because I'm just like, I want to talk about a meditation I learned, or show people how to get a benefit of an ice bath, or something. And I'm like, I feel like a dork, or I look like shit, or I don't feel articulate today, or in the best mood and I only want to show the shiny, like pretty, perfect parts of my life publicly. And it's people like you that helped me to go, no, man, just be real. Just do you, and there's going to be a few people that dig it and a few that don't. And the few that don't, God bless them, they're going to find someone else they dig.

[01:50:53]Sah D'Simone:  That's right. Bless them.

[01:50:55]Luke Storey:  Block and bless.

[01:50:56]Sah D'Simone:  Block and bless. And spirituality needs a revamp. It needs a revamp. It needs us to just like let the hair down, and legit, just like show up in its fullness. It needs this radical authenticity for people to relate, this like, when you put people on the guru stand, in this pedestal, we're bound for pain to happen. Unless you're talking about really, really radically awakened beings, which are very few on planet Earth, shit's going to happen.

[01:51:37]Luke Storey:  Yeah. Well, I still do, but when I used to work with recovering alcoholics, and addicts, and whatnot, and I do, I have a couple still, but they used to be quite a lot. And maybe I was 10, 15 years into the game and I could feel them looking at me like I knew something or had something that they didn't have, and I would always remind them, I'm like, you might think I'm cool now, but wait, I will definitely disappoint you. Just get prepared, like I am way more human than you realize.

[01:52:07] And I had a great teacher tell me that, too, because I would just look at him with this adulation, because the way he was interacting with life was so beyond my level of consciousness at that point. And he would be like, don't get it twisted, dude. I don't have anything on you. I'm a complete fuck-up just like you. I had just been on the path maybe a couple of years longer. So, I think that's good that it is very disappointing when you put someone on a pedestal, and then their humanity shows through.

[01:52:34] And then, sometimes, you can lose faith in the teaching because the teacher has disappointed you. And then, you throw the baby out with the bathwater when it was just that person's humanity, not the teaching that they carry or represent in their dharma. It's just, they're fucking human. They're still in the human body. They still have instincts, and an ego, and an intellect. And it's going to show through, even the best kimono at times. 

[01:52:59]Sah D'Simone:  Precisely. And it's important to recognize this, and I say this in the book a lot, it's like, I may just be a couple steps ahead of you, honey, but like we're walking out through this bridge together. Like we're in this thing together, honey. And showing up in my full crack baby looks, in my fullness, and like not withholding, and just like really sharing me as the fullest experience, it's so healing to bring forth vulnerability as a default, not from a place of a victim, and approve of me, and love me, but vulnerability, as like this is what it's like, honey, you know what I mean?

[01:53:38] I moved into a house a-month-and-a-half ago, and look at me, I'm moving again, and people are all confused by it, I'm like, this is what's like. You can be a spiritual teacher, and be talking at all these important things, and doing all these things, but like shit's still happening. This is still what it's like, you know what I mean? You can still like have ice cream three days in a row and still be in the high vision, honey. 

[01:53:58]Luke Storey:  I'm fixing to have some tonight.

[01:54:01]Sah D'Simone:  I would love some.

[01:54:02]Luke Storey:  I want to buy a cigar, and Alyson's like, really? You're getting your medicine. Give me some of that Moroccan mint chip. And I got one for myself, too. Maybe we'll have an ice cream party when we're done. I got one more question for you.

[01:54:14]Sah D'Simone:  Okay. Go.

[01:54:14]Luke Storey:  My last question is, well, it's really three in one. It's, who are three teachers or teachings that have influenced your life and your work that our audience might be able to go also learn from? 

[01:54:26]Sah D'Simone:  One teacher, His Holiness, the Dalai Lama. Please, if you don't know the dude, do yourself a favor and just like look him up. And also, recognize that he's in his mid-80s, so if you have the opportunity soon enough to be in the presence of a radical saint, someone that shifts timelines just by basking in his presence, go. I highly recommend him. And Jetsunma Tenzin Palmo, incredible radical saint. This woman, oh, my God. She spent 12 years in a cave. And Dalai Lama was like, girl, time to come down, honey, time to teach, you've been here long enough, go, go, go. So, she's another incredible person.

[01:55:15]Luke Storey:  Say the name again. I feel so sorry for the guys writing my show notes.

[01:55:18]Sah D'Simone:  That's okay. Jetsunma Tenzin Palmo.

[01:55:22]Luke Storey:  Got it.

[01:55:23]Sah D'Simone:  Google is going to give it to you. Trust. And then, someone in the West that I love is Sharon Salzberg. I think she's an iconic being. I have sort of made a radical shift a couple of years ago to only study with Brown, Black bodies or women. And the Brown, Black bodies who are teaching have to have queerness as part of their roster of things they're talking about because it was a very necessary change they needed to happen, for me to become someone who can speak to this larger audience that I have listening now, for that reason. So, I think these three people are amazing beings. And, yeah, go check them out. Yeah, they have books. They have documentaries. They have all kinds of things. And, yeah. 

[01:56:23]Luke Storey:  Well, I don't know that much about the Dalai Lama or any of them in the past, but I do get these nuggets sometimes where, and this is very true of a lot of people that follow Buddhist traditions, but this radical compassion, like how the Tibetan people have been just nullified by the communist Chinese and stuff, and they're like, we love the Chinese. They're awesome. I'm like, yeah, I can't think of one, but there are Dalai Lama quotes, were like, what do you think about these assholes that do this thing? And they're like, Oh, I love them. They're perfect. It's like, wow.

[01:56:56]Sah D'Simone:  It's just that knowing that karma is like a natural law. So, at the base level, I know I've been articulating to this, in the book, I do talk in detail about this, but it's like, oh, shit, if this happened to me, I probably did this to them. Like it's such a radical shift to be like, oh, shit, the Tibetan people actually do this thing to the Chinese in a previous life. And don't drink the Kool-Aid. And I speak about not drinking the Kool-Aid all the time in the book because I do talk about scientific research.

[01:57:25] I do invite different views into one view, but it's always good to think about that. When really traumatic things happen in our lives, it's like, this past week, in the courses I developed in detail a lot, and people in the online course, they don't have the opportunity to talk back to me, they leave comments and things. But with my private students, I still see a handful of them. And I say to them, this whole last week, I was just like in this like place where I was like, this really difficult thing happened to me.

[01:58:00] And I'm like, you did that to them. You did this to them in a past life. And it's so jarring to hear. And I'm like, hey, I'm going to tell you something, it's a little edgy. Let's see how this lands for you. And then, from that place, you start to work through. Like opening up to compassion, opening up to wisdom, opening up to like, perhaps, like how is this being repetitive in my life over and over again? One thing I do have to say, though, sharing this study under a different lineage, then Tenzin and Dalai Lama. But that's why I gave you these like iconic people coming together, get a book from each, and then get Spiritually Sassy, honey.

[01:58:37]Luke Storey:  Well, that's a perfect segue way into the very last thing we're going to cover. Where can people find the book, and your website, and social, and all that?

[01:58:46]Sah D'Simone:  Okay. Thank you. Spiritually Sassy, you can get everywhere. 

[01:58:53]Luke Storey:  By the time this comes out, it will be out everywhere.

[01:58:54]Sah D'Simone:  Okay. So, by the time this comes out. Okay. Everywhere books are sold or on my IG bio, @SahDSimone. My website is myhealingally.com. Myhealingally.com. And connect with me on social @SahDSimone, S-A-H-D-S-I-M-O-N-E.

[01:59:15]Luke Storey:  What's the origin of that name? I was thinking about that.

[01:59:18]Sah D'Simone:  Italiano.

[01:59:19]Luke Storey:  Oh, it is?

[01:59:19]Sah D'Simone:  Mom is Italian.

[01:59:19]Luke Storey:  Oh, really? 

[01:59:21]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah.

[01:59:21]Luke Storey:  Oh, interesting. That's so trippy. In Brazil, you have like such a mashup of all these different cultures.

[01:59:26]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah.

[01:59:26]Luke Storey:  Yeah. I think that's why Brazilian people are so beautiful. They're like a mix of all the best from all around the world.

[01:59:32]Sah D'Simone:  Dad is Lebanese, mom is Italian, born in Brazil. It's like, whoa. And everyone there, I mean. 

[01:59:41]Luke Storey:  I think, you know what, I'm going to close on this note. I think the key, and I'm not doing this because my girlfriend's White, I guess you could say, but I always thought the key to ending racism is like if no people mate with someone of their same race, if like everyone had mixed babies, eventually, within a few generations, everyone would just be like Brazilians, mostly are, like just totally amazed, you know what I mean?

[02:00:06]Sah D'Simone:  That's right.

[02:00:06]Luke Storey:  Yeah. Everyone to just be like the same color eventually. And then, we would all just forget about other bullshit. Anyway, it's a pipe dream. Thanks for joining me here today. Love you, brother.

[02:00:15]Sah D'Simone:  Thank you.

[02:00:16]Luke Storey:  Let's go have some ice cream.

[02:00:17]Sah D'Simone:  Yes. 

[02:00:18]Luke Storey:  I'm going to smoke a cigar. Are you still smoking cigarettes?

[02:00:21]Sah D'Simone:  Maybe I will. Maybe I will. Yes. 

[02:00:25]Luke Storey:  See, even spiritual teachers have their vices sometimes.

[02:00:27]Sah D'Simone:  That's right. I mean, honestly, I picked up organic cigarettes. Like when was I here? Maybe two, three weeks ago.

[02:00:34]Luke Storey:  Yeah. 

[02:00:34]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah. I had a little bit of a heart break, and then just resurfaced. But three years, three months, and a week sober from drugs and alcohol. I'm still navigating the tobacco and being kind to myself. Being kind to myself. It's important. Everyone listening, and you're struggling with addiction, one day at a time, honey. One day at a time.

[02:00:58]Luke Storey:  Yeah. Congratulations, too.

[02:00:59]Sah D'Simone:  Thank you. It's big.

[02:01:01]Luke Storey:  Yeah. It's a gift to the world, too, when people make it out of that, man. Most people don't. I mean, I think a lot of people that evade the demise of addiction that is eventually going to get most of us, I think we think, oh, yeah, everyone eventually just outgrows it. No, they fucking don't. Visit a prison, and a morgue, and a cemetery, that's where, I don't know the percentage, but the vast majority of people that are really afflicted end up. So, those of us that make it up and out are truly blessed. And that's something to be grateful for.

[02:01:31]Sah D'Simone:  Yeah. I could never look just like thinking that like cocaine, and pot, and alcohol was such a default for me.

[02:01:38]Luke Storey:  Yeah, I know. I hear you, dude.

[02:01:40]Sah D'Simone:  Well, thank you so much. 

[02:01:41]Luke Storey:  Well, now, we're living clean. God bless.

[02:01:43]Sah D'Simone:  Yes. Thank you.

[02:01:44]Luke Storey:  Love you, dude.

[02:01:44]Sah D'Simone:  Love you, too. Thank you so much.

[02:01:45]Luke Storey:  Thanks for coming on.

[02:01:46]Sah D'Simone:  Thank you.



Beekeeper's Naturals
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Cacao Bliss
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