39: The Master Key To Enlightened Sex
John Gray
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Take a moment to ponder this question: Do you know everything you need to know about sex? Have you figured out how to have a healthy and fulfilling sex life? If you're like 99.9% of the population, you've probably found this part of the human experience to be one of the most perplexing aspects of life.
Why are we so often powerfully attracted to the exact wrong person? Are there varied forms of chemistry between people? Can you control chemistry? Why does orgasm seem to cause a 'hangover' reaction in men? What's the deal with porn? Is it healthy, or will it undermine our relationships? Is monogamy natural for humans, and if so- is it even possible long-term? Can women learn to have casual sex without falling in love? And what about men? Are they immune to pair bonding with sexual partners?
If you've pondered any of these questions, you've stumbled on the right podcast. In this episode, we explore the topic of sex from the perspective of spiritual practice and personal development. Our guest John Gray provides answers to so many of our sexual mysteries, from a scientific, as well as metaphysical point of view. This is one that you’ll likely listen to a couple times, due to it’s content density.
Do you know someone who likes sex? Someone who has issues with sex? If so, do them a service and pass this show along. It's my belief that we could all use some help in this area, and that the world might just be a better place if we were all achieving a deeper and more meaningful relationship to our own sexuality.
To your loins...
Luke
“Don’t fix, connect” .
”Ask questions, don’t give answers”
[On men’s need to “fix” in order to make women happy]
”Relationships are compromise, but not giving up who you are”
”To the extent that you are needing something and missing it, you tend to recreate the situation. We tend to be drowned to situations that wake up unresolved feelings inside of ourselves. And the reason they can be so sexually charged, is because there’s such a deep aliveness associated that’s been suppressed”
[On passion and the reason why we tend to attract the wrong person]
— John Gray
view episode overview
- The 4 types of chemistry and what kills them
- How hormonal duality works and affects attraction
- The ideal mate, a pipe dream? The 80x20 rule
- What makes sex different for men and women
- Safety & connection: understanding women's needs, and solution tools for men
- Men's biological need for feeling successful and acknowledged
- Sex is dead. Understanding the hero dynamic, vasopressin, and the flip side of pair bonding
- Understanding women's complex psychology and how to navigate
- Respect vs. appreciation: the distinction and who needs what
- Role reversal and hormone influence
- Why sometimes are we turned on by the exact wrong person
- How childhood trauma affects our sex life
- What causes sex addiction and how to get out of it
- What does porn do to us and how it affects our relationships, and our b train and productivity
- What's up with masturbation and the male orgasm hangover
- How to create attraction and polarity between a couple and how to keep it alive
- Does monogamy work?
- Do older men bond more easily?
- Can woman have sex without following in love?
- Should men practice semen retention or let it all go?
